Why Being On Call For Thanksgiving Sucks

Every year around this time, the same conversation resurfaces in medicine:
“Well, this is what we signed up for.”
And that’s true. People don’t stop getting sick because it’s a holiday. The privilege of taking care of them doesn’t pause either.

But here’s the other truth - the one most of us quietly swallow because we don’t want to sound ungrateful or dramatic:

Being on call for Thanksgiving is hard in a way that’s difficult to explain unless you’ve lived it.

Not impossible. Not tragic. Just…heavy.

There’s a particular loneliness that comes with walking past empty hallways while the rest of the hospital is dimmed to holiday mode. An ache in knowing your loved ones are gathered somewhere you aren’t. A singular kind of mental gymnastics involved in convincing yourself that Thanksgiving dinner on a random Monday in December is “basically the same.”

It’s not that we don’t love the work. Most of us do.
It’s that loving the work doesn’t exempt you from the cost of it.

The Emotional Math of Holiday Call

What makes holiday call uniquely draining isn’t just the missed meal or the fatigue. It’s the mismatch - the feeling that the rest of the world is synchronized to a rhythm you no longer get to follow.

Everyone else is settling into warmth, tradition, connection, and you’re answering pages, managing crises, eating whatever the cafeteria decided counts as a “seasonal entrée.”

And you try to be a good sport. You remind yourself you’re useful here. And needed here.
But there’s still that quiet moment, maybe as the afternoon drags on, when families everywhere are sitting down to eat, where you feel the distance between your life and theirs.

The Part That Is Meaningful

Holiday shifts have their moments. The patient who’s scared and relieved you showed up.
The family who thanks you because you were the one person who was there and helped someone through one of their worst days.

Those moments matter deeply. But they don’t erase the very normal, human sadness of missing your own people.

It Doesn’t Make You Weak to Admit It

Medicine loves the idea of the tireless, self-sacrificing clinician. The one who’s above earthly things like holidays or normal schedules.

But most of us aren’t built that way, and pretending we are only makes everything feel worse.

You can love medicine and still dread holiday call.
You can be grateful and still feel the sting of missing out.
You can be committed and still wish you were home.

None of that makes you spoiled, dramatic, or unprofessional.
It just makes you human.

So Yes, It Sucks

Not because we don’t care.
Not because we’re entitled.
But because even people who show up for everyone else deserve connection and rest and tradition, too.

If you're working this Thanksgiving:
Eat something warm.
Step outside for a minute of daylight.
Text someone who makes you laugh.

And know that you’re not the only one feeling it.

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